Nevermind....

Well, pretty much ignore the last post. I received a VERY harsh e-mail from Joe (although 100% honest) basically stating that he doesn't want to even consider marriage. He also said that he's afraid of us splitting up, but only because Jillian is attached to me. I refuse to stay in a relationship that's only being maintained because we have a house together and because our kids are attached. I deserve better than that. So I don't know. I sent him an e-mail pretty much laying the facts out and letting him know that if he's only in this for the kids, then I will start paperwork to split up the house tomorrow. I can't take this right now. I've cried for about 2 hours already. Hopefully he didn't mean it how it came out, but I don't know how it could be taken any other way. I want someone to love me for ME... not just for my child rearing abilities.

I need help with colors!!!

Okay, I need your help. Joe and I were talking about things we would want at our wedding (when & IF) it ever happens, and I got a little stumped on colors. Joe wants him and all his guys to wear their dress blues (aka: navy blue) and I'm trying to figure out what colors would look good with that. The first thought is obviously red, but red was the primary color in my first wedding and I do NOT want that! Then I was talking to Joe's sister-in-law and she suggested champagne with red roses (champagne is like a really muted gold - think of the color on some of those Honda and Toyotas). I like that, but it's almost like just having blue and tan... pretty, but kinda boring. Joe's sister-in-law (the one I was consulting) did bright yellow with their dress blues, but I kinda got the feeling that she doesn't want me doing the same color scheme that they did. So do you guys have any other suggestions?

Surprises

Well, as most of you know, Joe has his 2 weeks of leave set, but he's not telling me!!! It's just not fair! All he is telling me is that it's in April, he won't be home for Easter, and that's about it. He even went to the extent to call my BOSS to ask off of work for me!! On one hand, it's all very sweet and romantic..... on the other hand, it's a royal pain in the butt! I just told him that since I have absolutely no idea when he'll be home, if he walks in the door and the house is a wreck, and I haven't showered, he will only have himself to blame. :) He agreed and said that was fair... I guess it will have to be! I even tried to pry the information out of his sister... it didn't work. Pretty much everyone in his family knows (and he has a VERY big family). Some of my friends have said that maybe he has something "big" up his sleeve..... I wish. I would pass out on the floor if he walked through my door and dropped to one knee. The thing is, I know that won't happen. Joe is FAR (and I mean F-A-R) from ready to make it legal. I guess I'll just have to be patient and do my best not to get my hopes set on some big, romantic hoop-la. He'll come home when I least expect it, and he may not propose, but he'll be out of harm's way for almost 3 weeks (once you consider all the travel time) and that's definately something I can live with. :)

Muesli

I found this recipe and it is SOOOOOO good!!! It's extremely simple to put together and also fairly low on calories.

Muesli - makes 2 servings - 285 calories per serving

• 1 cup rolled oats (same thing as "old fashioned oats" in the cereal aisle)
• 1 tbsp chopped dates
• 1 tbsp chopped almonds
• 4 tbsp plain yogurt (I used vanilla yogurt and added more like 5 tbsp)
• 4 tbsp fresh (I used frozen) berries (I used blueberries and raspberries, but you can use whatever sounds good)

Combine all ingredients and then pour low-fat milk over it (probably only about 1/8 to 1/4 cup)

ENJOY!!! :)

More Deaths

Well, there have been a total of 6 Illinois National Guard deaths in just the past 3 weeks. That's 2 per week.... not statistics that I'm comfortable with. And the 4 that were killed just a few days ago died in the very same location that Joe is at. I am so worried. I pray at least twice a day for his safety, but the fact remains that not even prayer can guarantee his safety over there. I try so hard not to focus on the negative, but how can you not when you're getting an e-mail every couple of weeks telling you about another injury or death that we've had! And then our FRG leader had the nerve to say in the e-mail, "We just need to focus on the fact that our soldiers will be home soon." In what twisted sense of reality is 7 months "soon"?! I am so tired of being worried sick every second of every day and not being able to do a thing about it. I just want him home.

Tyler read me a book!!

Tyler picked out Hop on Pop by Dr. Suess this afternoon and read it to me!! The video file is too big to upload on here, but if you go to http://www.vimeo.com/3367798 you can view the video. :)

Tyler's Awesome Math Skills........

For quite awhile now Tyler has been able to add numbers. We'll be driving down the road and he'll be in the back seat saying, "Two plus two is four.... three plus one is four...." etc., etc. So a few days ago, out of curiousity, I wrote down 2+2 on a piece of paper and showed him how you line the columns up and add it. So then I gave him double and triple digit equations and he added them without ANY hesitation!! So today I took a video of him adding and I thought I would share it with you. :)